Season 1996 in the Hawthorn District Junior FL had reached the final stages. After getting a grand final in 1993, I'd missed out since then and I was determined to get one this year. I knew I had the job in Canberra coming just around the corner, so I figured it would be my last chance. I'd had a decent year, and whilst I knew I wasn't the best running umpire there were enough spots available for me to get a game on the final day.

I got the first semi final of the Under 14's (the HDJFL's highest level) between Hawthorn Citizens and Surrey Park, and I was running with a young umpire who was labouring with illness. I was determined to run a good one, and I ended up supporting my partner quite a lot. The game was closer than I thought it would be after the two sides met the previous week at Hawthorn with Surrey Park winning easily. At Richmond's City Reserve I was running like crazy and everything was clicking. My running, my positioning, my concentration and my consistency. The only time in my entire 19 year career that all four had clicked on the one day. I was going great guns.

In the final quarter we had an incident which - in the eyes of certain other people - changed everything. It was an unfortunate incident where I had just paid a free kick to Surrey Park and just as I did so, one of the Surrey Park players cleaned up a Hawthorn Citz opponent. This was at the time when we still had the five metre circle around the ball where players could contact each other (the circle was removed a couple of years later) so as long as the contact was legal - which it was - I couldn't do a thing about it. The trouble was the boy who engaged the shirtfront had shoulders like Jonah Lomu, and the boy who was hit was anything but and guess who came off second best. The Citz fans went off and so did the runner demanding action. I sent him off the ground but I erred slightly in not following it up because they needed him to help get the injured boy off the ground. There was a delay in getting that done, and I did call for the clock to be stopped (only to be told later that no such thing had occurred). The coach ran onto the ground for no good reason (there never is while the quarter is in progress) and I told him to get off or risk a forfeit, and his players were smart enough to tell him to get off.

I handled that as well as anyone could have in my view. We nearly had extra time, but a behind a few seconds before to Surrey Park gave them a one point win. Apparently the father of the boy who was hit wanted my head - but I'll repeat this here. There was nothing I could do.

I was happy with my performance, and I wasn't really surprised that I got the week of the preliminary final off to allow my partner to put in a performance to compete as he was ill when running with me. But I should have seen the danger signs. The advisor was judging me on that incident alone, and just completely ignored the rest of my performance.

I didn't know that until grand final presentation night the Wednesday before the grand final. It started badly. I was dumped in the goals, and my running partner from the first semi got the gig ahead of me - even though he ran a worse game in the preliminary final than I did in the first semi. But that wasn't the end of it either. The advisor gave himself the Under 12 grand final, and then uttered the words that pushed me over the edge;

There's no one else capable of doing a grand final.

I could have killed the bastard for being so egomaniacal! How dare he! I was perfectly capable of doing a grand final! I'd run the best game of my career - and for what? To be embarrassed like that? I'd already told the president of the league that I was not doing the goals - I'd commentate instead for the league's video, and that confirmed my decision as correct.

To cap off the night, my running partner from the first semi carried off the Golden Whistle. The boy had the wrong off field attitude and the assistant advisor agreed with me that the award was wrong. Under normal circumstances, there shouldn't have been a Golden Whistle for the HDJFL in 1996. But because the advisor had set a precedent in 1993 about giving it to the best umpire, and after eliminating all ineligible candidates - like those who had won it before (that took out two umpires) or those who had already umpired at the top level (that took out another one) or the advisor himself - the next in line was me. That award should have been mine!

It was cold comfort when the advisor was unable to carry out his appointment. I could have done that Under 12 grand final, but it would have felt hollow after the way I'd been treated.